How Storytelling Improves Your Communication Skills at Home and at Work
By Lily Golightly
Photo by S O C I A L . C U T on Unsplash
The efficacy of storytelling in interpersonal communication can be well evidenced by looking at an academic context. Teaching of any kind often incorporates literary tools when explaining difficult concepts. In general, and beginning at a young age, any information taught to us is conveyed through storytelling somehow. For example, when adults want children to remember a concept - say the sum of one plus one - they almost always call on narrative aids to illustrate them (ie; “If you have one apple, and I give you one of my apples, how many will you have in total?”). Often giving an ‘example’ is the most effective way to explain yourself - whether in describing a complex math problem or how you are feeling at a particular moment.
If you read Why We Remember Stories, you know that our empathetic response to a story is one of the most prominent determinants of whether or not we remember it. If we receive information accompanied by a narrative, we are already more likely to remember it than impersonal data. That likelihood further intensifies when the story has an element with which we can relate or empathize. Stories have the ability to translate abstract information into relevant knowledge - if the explanation is enthralling enough, we will internalize it even if we weren’t seeking it out.
Personal Life
The use of storytelling is present in the delivery of knowledge and most interpersonal interactions. Communication is at the core of human relationships and is an essential part of relating to others. Effective communication enables you to articulate your emotions in a way that is accessible to people from various perspectives. Storytelling’s role in communication is the product of all of the aspects discussed earlier - teaching others in an accessible way and creating a story that is relatable and thus both comprehensible and memorable.
When you are getting to know someone, storytelling provides so much of the context you piece together around them and how you perceive them as the relationship proceeds. During childhood, exercises like “Show and tell” instill in us the practice of creating interpersonal bonds by telling stories about our possessions and experiences.
Popularizing the concept of “36 Questions to Make You Fall in Love,” The New York Times created a formula for people to extract emotionally vulnerable stories from others - honestly, genius. This technique, used in card games, interviews, and everyday conversation, simply enlists the fact that a great story can almost always be coaxed out by asking the right question. Once given the space and opportunity to tell a fragment of their story, people will often feel vulnerable and be open to emotional closeness.
Storytelling plays an important role in the dynamics within your closest relationships (with family, significant others, or friends). If you can honestly and fairly articulate yourself, you have infinitely higher odds of getting what you need, want, and deserve from your relationships with others. However interlinked with storytelling, communication is about an equitable exchange - not only taking up space to narrate your personal experience. In turn, you must be willing to receive the stories of those around you with an open mind. Communication is not only about expressing our stories so that we feel understood, but also being understanding and self-aware when others misinterpret us. When we operate with self-interest at the forefront of our communication, we will cling to the story we created from a place of ego, and misunderstanding can become hard to avoid.
When employed successfully, communication results not only in reduced conflict but in the unparalleled sense of feeling heard and understood by those around you.
Photo by Campaign Creators on Unsplash
Professional Life
Beyond being an asset to a healthy personal life, accurate communication is important for establishing a clear brand identity. As discussed in How People Can Relate to Your Brand Through Storytelling, the narrative that you shape around your brand will convey to your audience what they are getting involved in. Suppose this is communicated clearly and in a way that entices your audience on an emotional level. In that case, your brand will have an advantage over others that have failed to compel people authentically.
On an internal level, most professions are fueled by teamwork and interpersonal collaboration. How can any business expect ‘productivity’ if healthy communication and open-mindedness are absent? Working as a member of a team may involve storytelling in multiple ways. Pitching an idea that you had will be effective only if you can convey your vision to others in a way that they understand. Everyone’s brain works differently - storytelling can bridge the gaps in communication in a professional setting by enabling each individual to express what they envision to the team and why.
The stories that we tell, and those that we hear from others, enable us to relate to our surrounding environment and understand how to interact with varying contexts in a nuanced way. Storytelling is a central tenet of communication and can be used to educate people, create closeness with others, and facilitate balanced interactions in both personal and professional settings.
